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        by
      N.E. Adjunct
       
       Perhaps
      you've been to an invitational 'we-love-our-adjuncts' banquet or
      luncheon. Some are annual soirees; others less formal affairs marking
      the start or end of a term.  
      I've seen my share of them
      over a decade tramping between diverse campuses as a contingent
      teacher. The food is good, the smiles are fixed, the mood is
      manipulatively cheery, and the gathering's expense may well
      exceed the combined day's pay of all the adjuncts in the room. 
      
        As the low-wage instructors hungrily
        eye the awaiting buffet spread, the dean or program director warmly
        convenes the ceremonies and prompts round-the-room
        self-introductions (especially since most of the itinerant
        teachers don't know their fellow adjuncts beyond a mingled flurry
        of gear while swapping classrooms).
       
      
         
       
      
        At an orchestrated moment the college
        president or other high-ranker bounds to the podium, lobs a
        few laudatory comments, then hastily retreats before encountering
        any off-book exchanges with preening or pissed-off adjuncts.
       
      
         
       
      
        However brisk the presidential
        departure, the echo of a misty platitude clings to the air as
        some sticky aerosol:
       
      
         
       
      
        "You teachers are where the rubber
        meets the road."
       
      
         
       
      
        Ugh. There it is again. The more times I
        hear it, the sharper is my reflexive cringe at the metaphor.
       
      
         
       
      
        It sounds commendable. It sniffs sweetly
        appreciative. And it is, unfortunately, apt.
       
      
         
       
      
        Adjunct teachers are where the
        rubber meets the road.
       
      
         
       
      
        Let's hoist it on the rack and try
        to figure why it rubs so wrong.
       
      
         
       
      
        Granting a generous interpretation, the
        sentimental retread here is that adjuncts are frequently
        on the front lines of battle, the fingernail to the itch, the igniting spark where all aspirations
        and preparations finally combust into action (to kaleidoscopically
        mix metaphors).
       
      
         
       
      
        But this tired one gets rolled out time
        and again. Indeed, in ways more than one, adjuncts are quite
        like wheels on the bus of academe (English instructors may note the
        imagery has switched from a metaphor to a simile):
       
      
         
       
      
        We haul much of the
        organization's weight on our steel-belted backs. A
        sizable slice of all college courses are now capably
        taught by adjuncts, typically with advanced degrees and practical
        experience. However, the number of an adjunct's assignments at any one
        institution is kept strategically below the level that might
        obligate employer provided benefits. This smacks of an unspoken
        collusion between institutions: they collectively reap labor from
        instructors who may cobble together a fulltime teaching load up and down
        the road, while the HR budget is exempted from a fair share of employment
        costs. An institution's bottom line and its upper echelons catch a cheap
        ride on the overburdened, undercompensated backs of adjuncts. Let
        other professions beware: no position is immune to this type of cunning
        subdivision.
       
      
         
       
      
        We leave a depleting tread of
        ourselves behind each roll of the wheel.
        Adjuncts care, and students love them for it as is often reflected in
        teaching evaluations above the norm. A recent American Federation of
        Teacher survey quantified the obvious: adjuncts teach for the
        enjoyment of it, not so much for the pay. Market economics can fix the
        precise measure of adjunct devotion -- it's the dollar
        discrepancy between what is fair and what is tolerated, even as those
        forces squeeze a teacher's joy right out of the margins. 
        Adjuncts are solitary wayfarers, with few opportunities to network
        and organize. Thinly succored with low levels of support and pay,
        adjunct instructors are run near empty with few
        rest stations to refuel.
       
      
         
       
      
        When we're worn out and threadbare,
        we are easily discarded and cheaply replaced.
        No benefits, no notice, no worries. The current job market has legions willing
        or desperate to accept unfair conditions. Some may counter
        that no one forces adjuncts to work under slavish terms when
        they can simply roll away. That position is a kissing cousin to the
        brutish "love-it-or-leave-it" mindset. Those unarmed and
        unarmored adjuncts who bravely protest injustices see it's not just a right, but also a duty to an educator's highest
        ideals. The coward's way is to quit the field or to banish the fighters
        who shame the abusers.
       
      
         
       
      
        So the truth of it is, adjunct teachers are
        where the rubber meets the road.
       
      
         
       
      
        Have you heard it said, too? Did it drive
        you to higher revs of motivation, or did it fall flat as it rolled by?
       
      
         
       
      
        Simmering anger and resentment meld for an
        unsavory sauce, and even the finest meal is spoiled when talk from the
        dais is hard to swallow. And I'm disappointed that my attendance gives
        credence to the saccharin gratitude that ices our token cake, when
        we really crave fair compensatory bread. 
        Motoring the 45-minutes homeward
        from still another obligatory adjunct fete -- yet even more rubber
        on the road trailing my ever-thinner tires -- the
        delectably-catered evening settles as malnourishing as my grocery
        budget between uncertain teaching assignments. If they really want us
        to feel appreciated, next time save a few bucks on the banquet and keep
        us at home with a small bonus check and a large pizza.
        
      
         
       
      
        It may be well-intended as an
        inspirational accolade; or perhaps an admonition. Adjuncts are
        where the rubber met the road.
       
      
         
       
      
        To my ear, it rings more like a eulogy for
        road kill.
       
      
        
          
               
             
           
      Writer's
      Note: I've rarely been one to hide behind anonymity for any
      rants or outrageousness, at frequent lamentable cost. In this case, I will
      engage cloaking to protect three parties:  
 1) Myself -- adjuncts are an
      insecure breed by definition.  
 2) Other adjuncts -- perhaps any
      administrators reading this might assume it's by one of their own teachers and
      may treat their adjuncts with greater care.  
 3) My employers -- I
      don't want anyone feeling obliged to coddle me more than other adjuncts by
      fear of publicity,  
      rather than a sense of fair play. 
         
         
         
   
 
        
           
         
       
      
      
               
  
          
       
            
         
      
      
      
  
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